Parents are experts on crushing dreams. We will ruin our children’s lives over and over again. In my case, this mainly involves denying my daughter chocolate whenever she wants it. I’ll be the first to admit that others may have more complex dreams to crush.
Teghan would disagree.
No one is better at keeping score than kids. Think long and hard about the things you say no to; it could come back a thousand times to haunt you. No pressure. Some of it is unavoidable, but you may want to throw caution to the wind once in a while and say yes when your instincts are giving off sirens. Or when your pocketbook is empty.
Sure, your kid might give up piano lessons a week after you buy that piano….but it’s better than a lifetime of being blamed for destroying their career as a concert pianist. It’s amazing what we believe we’re capable of when we don’t have to prove it. For Pete’s sake let’s make them prove it.
Other times parents only have to give their all-powerful permission. No further effort or monetary contribution necessary. But being responsible worriers by nature, parents often say no because they have no idea what they are really saying no to. Sometimes parents are offered the unique opportunity of crushing their children’s very souls. Think about this:
Very few things in life are better than listening to music alone in my car.
It has never been on a top ten list or anything, but that was clearly an oversight. I just forget sometimes. The biggest thing I have in common with my husband is that music will trump everything else when given a chance. And lately we haven’t been giving it a chance. It often gets replaced by secondary loves.
For example, Dave is completely focused on artwork right now. He has partnered with a friend on a comic book project, and his recording studio is getting dusty. Meanwhile, here I am stringing words together. Here, there and everywhere– as if anyone really needs to know how I feel about life. But these things are very close secondary loves, so they do hold us for a while.
I used to be better at combining them.
But it’s the car ride that gets me. Sometimes I drive to work in silence, but it makes no sense. Technology is too perfect now for driving in silence. So I plug in my phone and listen to something. Today I actually wanted to wait in a drive-thru longer so I wouldn’t get home too soon. I wanted more time to listen; to think about what the world is like inside that particular soundtrack. Because the world can look and feel different when you change what it sounds like.Continue reading →